02/09/2020

What more can I say?

Clients and callers are surprised that I hadn’t taken a longer break for Chinese New Year. I mean, I could have if I wanted to. I was even given the permission to do so, but what’s the point of doing so when I’ll be greeted by an increased workload?

After all, I’m accruing my annual leave for emergency situations or for flights that I want to catch. Or maybe I love working too much.



Now that I’ve another job scope added to my position, there’s not much time left for me to be thinking about breaks anyway. I’d rather focus on completing what is before me and get the workload reduced to a bare minimum - even if it means shortening the time spent on lunch. I’ve gone to such extent of working while eating lunch - and we both know the result of that if done frequently. Even if it means running the risk of falling under the weather and going off on a sick leave. I know what you’re thinking. What’s the point of pushing myself beyond the edge and being ill as a result of the stress? The only answer I can give you is that I don’t have to spend an extra amount of time after I’ve recovered to catch up. One thing’s for sure; as long as I’m able to move around, there’s a chance I won’t take a day off unless I’m sick and glued to the bed.

Yet it drains me and makes me look more exhausted than I’m letting on. But it’s still better for me to force myself to complete all the paperwork without reaching out for help. At least it doesn’t give anyone - or even myself - something bad to critique on.

What more can I say?

When my personal life threatens to encroach into my work life, there’s only so much that I can do to stop both aspects of my life from mixing with each other. I’m someone who wouldn’t mind having the perfect work-life balance, but there are times when it will be shattered by a file’s urgency - or worse when rude, sarcastic people are getting on my nerves. Maybe my subconscious is correct on this: something must’ve happened for me to be easily irritated by petty matters. A part of me is also aware that something’s changed too.