Yet another ranting

The morning commute is draining me even more than I expected no thanks to the late nights and early mornings of my accord. I mean, who wants to willingly wake up at the crack of dawn and rush to their workplace with the fear of running late? No one, right? Yet I know a handful of people who do that on a daily basis as they live a terrible distance away. Even though I’ve the option of relying on either the public transport or the family car, it’s still a drag for me because it’s hard for me to sleep earlier. I don’t like to fall asleep during the commute as that would make me look like I didn’t sleep for 30 hours straight.

Mind you, I’ve done it before in real life. I remember it well: I was on the go the moment I landed in Adelaide. While I scooped my luggage from the baggage carousel and cleared Customs, I kept track of the time in the hopes that I wouldn’t be late for class. Due to a miscalculation on my part, I landed mere hours before the start of an academic week. I ordered an Uber cab from my phone and convinced the driver to use whatever route necessary to avoid the morning peak hour congestion so that I can arrive at my residence for a change of clothes on time. I managed to arrive on campus in time for my Evidence tutorial and somehow let it slip that “I spent the entire night on my return flight”. I caught up with the sister over coffee and lunch, completed errands at the grocery store and finally headed home - all about 5 hours later. As I was too exhausted to cook dinner, I purchased a bowl of salad from Poke Me (located somewhere in Gawler Place, near Hello Sarnie) and had it delivered via UberEats. I figured that the tiredness would send me to bed immediately after dinner but I found myself floating in the air for the next 7 to 8 hours with a book in hand. By the time I slept, it was 4 am the next morning. And if it hadn’t been for classes the next day, I’m sure I’d be awake for close to 36 hours.

As what I referenced earlier, if I keep busy with the paperwork, time flies faster than expected. Before I’m aware of it, the office takes a life of its own and sends everyone scurrying to complete their paperwork. That’s not to say that I’m not in a rush myself, but I can’t focus whenever there is a buzz of activity around me. Throw me in a silent office before or after hours and you’ll see me flourish at an unprecedented rate with music blasting through the headphones. Only problem? You’ll see the significantly permanent BB cream on my face. But the more hours I pull for work, the less I have for myself - and that’ll signal the entrance of a burnout, be it an emotional or physical kind. It wouldn’t be worth it to sacrifice my health once again.

If I don’t keep myself busy, the stack of files will grow in height and there’ll be an added pressure to complete it. And I don’t want this either; nothing in life is worth the amount of stress - and I’m already dealing with enough stress as it is in my personal life, solidifying the frown lines on my face. We both know what continual exposure to stress would do to one’s system: either high blood pressure will say hello or I’ll collapse from a heart condition. IF you read online articles, a majority of it, if not all, have illustrated the dangerous effects of cortisol on the body and on the emotions.