11/29/2017

I’m sure the dream had an introduction to it, but I can’t, for the life of me, remember what it was about. What I can remember is that the dream began from the middle onwards.

I dreamt that we toured a place in the middle of the city. While my mother was in another part doing her own thing, I was on the first floor of a shop, browsing through the merchandises that they offered. It was divided into two smaller spaces with a wooden fence. The wooden fences were behind low two-tier shelves. While shoppers and employees could talk with each other over the fence, we had to use the main entrance if we wanted to go from space to space - or at least that was what one of the shop assistants mentioned to me when I inquired about the presence of the wooden fences. The camera then panned to the corner, where there was boxes arranged in a neat line, before I saw the traces of an escalator bringing the shoppers from ground floor to the first floor.

Somewhere along the way, I met an adult who had a toddler son sleeping in the back and a baby daughter in the car seat at the front. He offered me a ride and since it was someone whom I knew well, I decided to take up on his offer. He removed the car seat and I ended up carrying the infant in my arms. The infant slept peacefully and didn’t break into a screaming match. When my phone finally connected to his hotspot, the notification exploded in my face, but my attention was scaled in on the WhatsApp messages from my Mom. As the place where she was became a crime scene, she told me to meet her at the McD near there.

When we arrived there, she was talking to a female stranger before she climbed up the 4WD that the adult drove. She asked me to look at the infant child’s legs. One of the legs were swollen and red - as if the poor child suffered from water retention - but there were no traces of blood. She said to drive us to somewhere safe and she’d reveal the reason behind her questions and what had truly transpired there and then.

Well… I sense an ongoing theme here: someone else is behind the wheel with me being in the shotgun seat without any indication of the driver’s facial features. Although I can see from the outline that it is a male, that’s as many hints as I can get. The wooden fences. Fences should symbolise a barrier to something. You know, like dividing the main roads and pedestrian walkways. Garden plots. Applying to the context of the scene, maybe it’s the intention/warning not to let people any closer than they should be. Have intellectual conversations, but never allowing anyone to see the inner depths of my heart. Or was it influenced by that book’s protagonist? As for the boxes, it might be the fact that I am boxing up my emotions and thoughts for the fear of revealing too much about myself.

I’ll admit that the sleeping toddler son in the dream was so adorable - to the point where if it were to occur in real life, I’d have to stop myself from pinching the kiddo’s cheeks. This scene reminds me of something that happened when I was about 5. The context is fuzzy in my brain; I only remember that my godfather had fetched us from some place in Chinatown and my godbrother was asleep on the front passenger seat, which was reclined to 75% of its maximum. I don’t bond very well with infants in real life. In fact, I make sure that I keep an arm’s distance from them, especially whenever they are crying their hearts out. For me to be willing to carry an infant throughout the car journey, who still remained quiet in my arms, it has to mean something significant. This definitely stretches things, but I’m guessing that as I’m growing older, I’ll learn to tune out their cries? Or my thoughts towards children will change after I’m married? *holds head in hands*