Just a Little Update from the Weary Soul

Eek, I hadn’t realized that it has been weeks since I last blogged.

I guess that’s work does to you, especially when you’re in the service industry and completing tasks like how plates after plates of delicious food are served through the kitchen service window at a bustling restaurant. It also doesn’t help me that I’m pressed for time, seeing that I’m still clueless and finding my way around the office.

I’m drained by the time I returned from work.



I won’t entertain the idea of staying back in the office after hours for now. Maybe after I familiarized myself with the company practice will I consider working OT when there’s an urgency of documents and if I live nearby. I don’t want to be caught in the peak hour traffic congestion and arrive home an hour or two later.

At least being busy and on the go has kept my worries at bay . It forces my brain to focus on something else, which is the tasks that are associated with my job position. Believe me when I say that extreme worries don’t bode well for anyone as it sends you down the path of insomnia. The university student in me may fancy the late nights because there’s additional time to perfect my assignments. The working me dislikes it because it craves for as much rest as possible to start off the day in the right mood. I don’t want to rock up to work with a spoiled mood and on the verge of irritability. I’d also like to avoid the tendency of downing cups after cups of coffee and tannin to keep awake and forgetting to hydrate myself with water instead.

I’ve paid for this countless times before.

Yet nothing much has changed with my emotions.

I still harbor the longingness to withdraw from social interactions when I’m on my own and away from the workplace (although a close friend would rather have me not do that). I crave for the time alone to recuperate from all the peopling during the day. I still have no idea whether I’m an introvert or not, but my battery depletes faster than a reasonable person’s. You wouldn’t want to see me or speak to me when I’m running low on energy. As mentioned above, I’m irritable and walk in circles with annoyance at myself. I’ll cite a recent example; because of the sudden urgency to complete a task, I felt a growing dislike at myself for not being able to do it on time and about to tug at my hair. I’m also suppressing my own emotions with as much self control as I have in exchange for a fruitful period. I don’t like when there’s too much free time. I prefer it when I’ve assigned tasks after tasks to finish. It permits time to fly faster through the cracks of my fingers.