What in the world?

Note: this is a scheduled post.

I remember waking up, feeling like someone bashed me with a tin dish tray on the head but what's missing was the actual pain. It's probably the effects of not eating well.

I still don't understand what the following dream is about; it's never happened before but, oh well, it might be the exhausted mind entertaining itself. And probably, I am unknowingly missing my friends back home. =)

I dreamed that a group consisting of Kyle, Amanda, my dear and myself were attending an event at the conference hall. Amanda was at the foyer, taking a breath of fresh air from the crowded area while I was in the toilet cubicle, almost throwing up from the ingested food during tea break. I think I must've eaten a peculiar concoction of dishes that my stomach disliked.

Mere hours earlier, I ran into Kyle near my car in the parking bay and realized that he looked interestingly different. The chap was happier in the dream than in real life, cracking jokes with me in the playful way that Cookie does. I was relieved to see it because I was rather worried about his sudden change in behavior in real life as he was not being himself and reticent.

We all converged at the hotel lobby the next morning as some of us needed to catch the flight out of the town while the rest including yours truly were preparing to make the long drive home. I caught hold of Husky before he left and exchanged a couple of words with him over the upcoming deadline for an assignment since we shared the same class. My dear suddenly surprised me with a hug from the back and planted a peck on my cheek, making me stunned for a split second.

An Early Merry Christmas Wish

Credits to Millers Moves for the image

And I'm off.

See you in January!! =)

Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year to all my readers!

Ranting Words

Okay, this doesn't look good at all.

I'm seated in front of the notebook and yelling my heart out to the obstreperous heavy metal songs that I am now listening to. The only time that I will do this is when there are negative emotions accumulating in me that I don't want to talk about, which is a really bad thing. I'll tell you why; it shows that the anger is building on the inside instead of being expelled from the system.

I'll have to warn you ahead of time that if this post sounds like I'm either crapping or ranting, it's because I indirectly am doing so. I'm not going to splatter my feelings all over the post, but I obviously need an outlet to vent my frustrations.

A part of me fears that whatever happened en-route to Taiwan may just repeat itself when we're heading off to the lovely refuge and I really want to avoid it. It doesn't help that it's an early morning flight we're catching. I don't want to be holding myself in the hotel room, scraping my heart with an imaginary spatula thus causing my loved ones anguish when I should be exploring the nearby retail (or food and beverage) outlets in happiness, sampling the wonderful cuisines that the place has to offer.

I'm just saying because whether it'll happen exactly in that manner remains to be seen.



Taipei Taoyuan International Airport
In reality, my eyes are burning hot as I pen this post. My emotions are being screwed as the departure date rolls nearer and nearer. It's like I'm unwilling to let go of something.

Wait, I think I know what it is.

I'm probably hesitant to leave my dear behind to venture into unexplored territories for a vacation without an unfathomable sense of concern. We're talking about a fortnight plus without any some form of communication and knowing me, I'm bound to grow worried - one way or another. The other side of me is aware that I should take this opportunity of flying out to clear the congested mind and breathe the fresh, unpolluted air of the lovely refuge before I'm thrown back into the second round of a hectic schedule, but the vacation resembles a leaking tap because of the amount of money being spent on it and I can see the wallet staring back at me with a gaping hole.

I'll tell you why now.

Between English, Law and Media Arts and my co-curriculum activities, there won't be much time left to spend on relaxation therapies and together with Bearie, I'll be downing loads of caffeine to cope with the stress and workload. It's pretty comical that I keep telling myself that I want a balanced scale of tough and easier subjects yet most of the ones I'm taking are leaning towards the harder side. Don't believe me? Pretty much all of my friends know that I took World History and World Issues together for the previous semester.

(There's however an annoying story behind it.)



Shamelessly copied from my personal Facebook page. It reads, "I seriously don't know what to expect anymore. Between this and that, I'm mentally exhausted and exasperated."
If I were to face the next semester in the current state that I am in, I think I'll collapse for the fourth time before I'm able to swim up to the surface to catch my breath. Trust me; I'm not as healthy as I should be.

On an unrelated note, the marks for my final papers have been announced.

Am I happy with the obtained scores? I won't say so. I'm instead relieved that the average is past the minimum required grade.

The Christmas Season Shopping

Hey there, my readers!

Guess what?

Christmas is a mere 5 days away! It's shocking to suddenly realize that time has flown past us in the blink of an eye. I remember being seated smack dead under the freezing air-conditioner, struggling with my History paper and now I can feel the temperature rising while preparing for the Christmas/New Year vacation abroad.

But still, have you settled with the presents for loved ones and friends? I've heard cases of people who'd actually wait until the eleventh hour to shop for the presents because there might be last-minute markdown on all if not some of the products. On the contrary, some folks wouldn't care much about the bulk discount. They would rather make the early purchase to secure the desired items and have it cleared out of the way.

For me, I am personally thinking of doing some Christmas shopping on Zalora Malaysia and browsing through the diverse collection of evening dresses that they have.

You may wonder, why specifically Zalora? Zalora offers the convenience of online shopping that offers a safe and secure payment channel with a fast delivery. There are a variety of fashion brands with matching accessories that are for sale at affordable prices.

Seeing that all of my college friends will be nudging me to attend the graduation prom next June (um, some of them were already casually talking about it even before the exams), I know that I will have to start searching for the dress that will accentuate all of the right places. Hey, every girl has her flaws.

After browsing through Zalora's online dress collection, I found a dress that might possibly fit what I'm looking for: a Yellow One Shoulder Evening Gown by ICE dressme and the best part is that it can be paired with an accompanying pair of earrings (Silver Floral Hoop Earrings by Black Queen, also from Zalora).

Oh yeah, before I forget, I will be having intermittent access to both the notebook and the Internet during the duration of my holiday as there won't be any free WiFi in the hotel that I'm staying in and I won't be paying through my nose for the access. Hell no. With that in your mind, please forgive me if there's any interrupted flow in the posting.

If I'm lucky, I might be able to post something while catching a meal at a WiFi-enabled restaurant. I'll try my best to reply to any emails or comments left behind, but I really can't guarantee. Please fret not; I'll respond to it when I'm back instead, which is somewhere in the middle of the next month. I have an interesting yet stressful life to return to. =)

Flyleaf - Dear My Closest Friend

Listening to the song wafted long-buried memories of that person. =/

Am I someone whom I no longer recognize?

Sitting here staring straight at the blinking cursor on the blank Microsoft Word page, thinking of what to pen for the next article (it's based on nature) for The Student Voice, I am suddenly catching myself wondering how I became the person that I am today. I like to think that it is maturity that is the cause behind the change, but as much as I am denying it, there is more to it than meets the eye.

There are times when I don't recognize the reflection I see in the mirror. What I see in the mirror image is someone who has stayed strong for so long that she has forgotten how to cry. A part of her wants to break down and allow the emotions to flow out of her fractured heart, but the other is being pressured to plaster a smile and laugh like there's no worry in the world.

It is so not me, I swear.

Credits to Funstatic for the image

But then again, those who've known me since childhood will tell you that I have never listened to rap or heavy metal songs during the younger days. Something however happened on Wednesday that changed everything. Don't ask me; I wouldn't be able to reply because I myself do not have the answer. If you were at the Lounge, you'd have seen me swinging my head at the flick of a switch to the beat of Eminem and Avenged Sevenfold that Husky and Shane played and the look that Husky gave me.

He was shocked beyond speechlessness.

I can't remember who it was but it was on one morning that someone casually asked Bearie and me if we were intending to contest for the Student Council next semester. We gave each other a glance before responding with a firm "no".

Don't be mistaken.

It's not that we don't want to be part of the Council, but it's just that the intensity of our subjects next semester is already threatening to murder us alive.

See, Bearie's taking Calculus and Chemistry. I'm taking Law and English and our mutual subject in Media Arts. Not to mention, I'll be a senior member in the Performing Arts Council and resuming my role as a journalist in the Yearbook.

Credits to Student Stress: How To Deal With It | Campaign Against Living Miserably for the image

Where will I be able to find the extra time to dedicate to the Student Council then? I'll be pushing myself further than I am willing to endure.

You may wonder, why am I abruptly writing about this?

Well, the reason is simple.

Shaney's pleas are still ringing in my ears as I compose this post. Therefore, I know I need to use the semester break to at least recover the bubbly and cheery person in me if I don't want her to be worried of me as well. Like I've said before, I'd rather see my loved ones being themselves, laughing and carefree even if it means burying the negative emotions and keeping it to myself.

Don't get me wrong here. I'm not trying to be a martyr here and will never be.

Until my next post, I'm out of here to enjoy the soothing music while trying to catch the proper sleep that has evaded me for so long now.

12/16/2013

Weird.

This is so weird.

Credits to Free Music Archive: All Tomorrow's Parties for the image

I dreamt that there was a farewell party in Student Success (for who, I don't know) and not only were all of the students present, some outsiders were around too - including someone whom I've chosen to limit my words with after that episode. He was seated nearest to the door and called my name, but I pretended not to hear and went on with my business.

Crap.

I was alone in one corner, enjoying the plate of food and working on the article for an off-campus event on the Yearbook when Kevin came by, asked if I could pour my suggestion into this thing that he was working on. When I did, I saw a long email conversation between him and Dexter in the background. It seemed that they were trying to settle a misunderstanding without involving me since I was close to both of them.

I pretended not to notice and gave my input of ideas, to which Kevin was thankful for as he never thought of it and nodded his thanks, returning to his earlier seat. But since Mama Carrie was using my notebook at this time, I went and dropped a greeting with all of the friends (including Dexter) who were in attendance.