Saturday, April 28, 2018


I dreamt that I was lost in a place that resembled Sunway Pyramid. I entered the elevator when the doors opened. I punched the button that would have brought me to the floor that I wanted. It didn’t work no matter how many times I pressed it. After silently cursing under my breath, I noticed the card reader below the buttons. I figured the floor that I wanted to go must only be accessible with card access. I panicked when the elevator moved on its own, not realizing that someone else had called for it.

I instantly felt the creeps the moment the doors opened. All I saw was darkness and a wall before I noticed that there was a chubby lady wearing the lanyard. She was shocked to see me there, but nevertheless entered and tapped her card to allow us access. When we exited, we were on the ground floor and she guided me to my original location using the public route.

In the next scene, I was on campus and making my way to the little booth to grab a book. The person who manned the booth was known amongst students for sourcing unique, rare yet awesome books. I wasn’t sure if she had the book that I wanted, but I wanted to try my luck. As I made my way there, I received an email from one of the university departments, apologizing that my application had not been approved for the program. The person in charge continued by saying that if I could redraft the submission with correct usage of words, they were more than willing to reconsider my application.

The three of us were at the booth. I silently groaned when I saw the queue that had gathered. Exhaustion clouded me, but I snapped to attention when I felt a comforting hand on my neck before the owner started massaging it. It turned out to be a friend who sensed the change in my body language and suspected that I was swimming in stress. Since the owner didn’t have the book that I wanted, we made our way to the exit. My sister suddenly rang my phone, but I told her that I’ll call her back later when I was free.

For me to have such a dream of being lost, I must be stressed out and feel like I’m alone in the dangerous world. The suppressed anger and sadness are bubbling at the surface, ready to make an array of an explosion at any minute. I reckon the doors are my subconscious cry for help - the emotions are searching for a suitable outlet without attracting any attention.

I almost fell off the bed in shock when I turned to see who dared to massage my neck. It was an acquaintance from Constitutional Law, but I’ve learned to focus on the context of the dream. I shudder to even consider this probability, but am I subconsciously craving for a boyfriend to hold me in his arms, be there for me in the journey, and assure me that everything will be alright again? *facepalm*

I do know that my heart feels heavy, though.

Based on what I saw when we left campus, it immediately dawned on me that I was back in Petaling Jaya. In a building opposite Menara Axis. Not directly opposite, but the Federal Highway separated the two buildings.

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